I'm On My High School Football Team

Don't Trust A Brilliant Idea Unless It Survives The Hangover.

True New Yorkers Do Not Really Seek Information About The Outside World. They Feel That If Anything Is Not In New York It Is Not Likely To Be Interesting.

Journalism Schools Are Good To Get A Job, But I Don't Know What Else They Are Good For. I Don't Like The Word "journalism" To Begin With. It's News Reporting, And That Consists Of Using Your Two Feet. The Only Lesson, Then, That You Could Give People Is How To Climb Stairs, Because There Are No Stories On The First Floor.

Football Is A Game Designed To Keep Coal Miners Off The Streets.

Journalism Should Be Truthful And Entertaining. You Know, With News And Important Facts You Can Entertain People Too. Have A Little Humor. Life Isn't All That Deadly All The Time, But While You're Having Fun, Tell The Truth. If Every Word Of A Column Is Deadly Serious, I Can't Read It. It Makes Me Throw Up.