I'm On My High School Football Team

When You Stop Drinking, You Have To Deal With This Marvelous Personality That Started You Drinking In The First Place.

The Other Feature Is A Gymnasium Named After Another Dead Politician Who Was Gifted With Fast And Extremely Sure Hands.

The Professional Arsonist Builds Vacant Lots For Money.

Journalism Schools Are Good To Get A Job, But I Don't Know What Else They Are Good For. I Don't Like The Word "journalism" To Begin With. It's News Reporting, And That Consists Of Using Your Two Feet. The Only Lesson, Then, That You Could Give People Is How To Climb Stairs, Because There Are No Stories On The First Floor.

Baseball Isn't Statistics, It's Joe Dimaggio Rounding Second Base.