I'm Too Cynical To Be An Optimist.

Wayne Brady, I Don’t Understand Why People Keep Joking That You’re Not Black. Wayne Brady, You Are Black. After All, I Only Remember You For All The Years You Played An Uppity Slave On ‘who’s Line Is It Anyway?’.

I Do Dark [humor]. I Like People Who Are Silly And Weird And People Who Are Surprising And Good At What They Do.

You Don't Know Anything About Pain Until You've Seen Your Own Baby Drowned In A Tub... And You Definitely Don't Know Anything About How To Wash A Baby.

It's Impossible For Me To Hear The Words Quadruple Murder Suicide Without Thinking Of My Grandparents.

When My Girlfriend Cooks Dinner, I'm Happy To Do The Dishes. Because I Make Her Wash Dishes When I Take Her To A Restaurant.