I Never Drink Water. I'm Afraid It

There Are Seven Natural Openings In The Head And Body. A Lawyer Is The Only Human Being With Eight. The Extra One Is A Slot To Store Money In, Should His Bank Be Unable To Hold All Of It.

The Nation Needs To Return To The Colonial Way Of Life, When A Wife Was Judged By The Amount Of Wood She Could Split.

Few Things In Life Are More Embarrassing Than The Necessity Of Having To Inform An Old Friend That You Have Just Got Engaged To His Fiancee.

I Don't Drink Anymore, On The Other Hand I Don't Drink Any Less Either.

We Frequently Hear Of People Dying From Too Much Drinking. That This Happens Is A Matter Of Record. But The Blame Is Always Placed On Whisky. Why This Should Be I Never Could Understand. You Can Die From Drinking Too Much Of Anything - Coffee, Water, Milk, Soft Drinks And All Such Stuff As That. And So As Long As The Presence Of Death Lurks With Anyone Who Goes Through The Simple Act Of Swallowing. I Will Make Mine Whisky.