I Promise I'll Do Anything For You,

I'd Be Vegetarian If Bacon Grew On Trees

I Had Been Drawing My Weekly Comic Strip, 'life In Hell,' For About Five Years When I Got A Call From Jim Brooks, Who Was Developing 'the Tracey Ullman Show' For The Brand-new Fox Network. He Wanted Me To Come In And Pitch An Idea For Doing Little Cartoons On That Show.

When Authorities Warn You Of The Sinfulness Of Sex, There Is An Important Lesson To Be Learned. Do Not Have Sex With The Authorities.

You Tried Your Best And You Failed Miserably. The Lesson Is 'never Try.' Homer Simpson

Warning Signs That Lover Is Bored: 1. Passionless Kisses 2. Frequent Sighing 3. Moved, Left No Forwarding Address.