I Said To My Husband, 'why Don't

Elizabeth Taylor's So Fat She Puts Mayonnaise On Aspirin.

To Maintain Success, Stamina Is More Important Than Talent. You Have To Learn To Be A Marathon Runner.

Don't Talk To Me About Gravity. When I Get Out Of Bed In The Morning, I Have To Be Careful Not To Step On My Breasts.

I Wish I Could Tell You It Gets Better. It Doesn't Get Better. You Get Better.

The Only Street I Like Is Rue Honore De Balzac, Because 'balzac' Sound So Gay, And I Love My Gays. I Might Like Parisians More If They Named Their Streets Only For Gay Icons, Like Rue Liza Minnelli Or Rue Bette Midler Or, My Favorite, Rue Mcclanahan.