I Think Beating Someone To Death With

You Are The Director Of Your Own Life Story. Don't Cast Idiots Or People Will Walk Out During Your 2nd Act.

I Do Think I Am Funny, Or I Wouldn't Be Where I Am Today. I Do Think There Is Always Room For Improvement And Learning.

I Just Get Excited Doing Shows. Off Stage I Am Actually Very Feeble And Must Be Spoon-fed Because My Hands Are Too Brittle.

I Never Leave A Dog Alone In A Car On A Hot Day. I Make Sure It's With An Elderly Person Holding A Baby.

Valentine's Day Is A Time To Celebrate The Joy Of Being In Love. Unless You're Single & Lonely Then It's Called Laundry Day.