I Took The Wife's Family Out For

I Went To My Doctor And Asked For Something For Persistent Wind. He Gave Me A Kite.

Marriage Is An Institution And That's Where A Couple Finishes Up.

I'm The Most Unromantic Lump Of Northern Suet. Yes, A Woman Did Accost Me Once In South Shields, But She Had A Face Like Red Rum.

The Mother-in-law Came Round Last Week. It Was Absolutely Pouring Down. So I Opened The Door And I Saw Her There And I Said, 'mother, Don't Just Stand There In The Rain. Go Home.'

I Toyed With The Idea Of Playing Ravel's 'pavane Pour Une Infante Defunte' But I Couldn't Remember If It's A Tune Or Latin Prescription For Piles.