I Type A 101 Words A Minute.

I Think We Should Only Get 3 Honks A Month On The Car Horn. Then, Someone Cuts You Off, You Press The Horn, And Nothing Happens. You're Like, "crap! I Wish I Hadn't Seen Ricky On The Sidewalk!"

I Went To A Record Store, They Said They Specialized In Hard-to-find Records. Nothing Was Alphabetized!

A Severed Foot Is The Ultimate Stocking Stuffer.

I Find A Duck's Opinion Of Me Is Very Much Influenced By Whether Or Not I Have Bread.

I Had A Bag Of Fritos, They Were Texas Grilled Fritos. These Fritos Had Grill Marks On Them. They Remind Me Of Summer, When We Used To Fire Up The Barbeque And Throw Down Some Fritos. I Can Still See My Dad With The Apron On. Better Flip That Frito, Dad, You Know How I Like It.