I Used To Be A Folk Singer,

I Think The Longer Britain Is In Europe The Better.

Now, The Country Is In A Terrible State, And You've Blamed It On A Number Of Things: Unemployment Rate, The Value Of The Pound And All That... Wrll, It's Because The National Anthem Is Boring.

I've Always Liked It Here. Part Of Me Is Irish. My Family Comes From The West Coast, So Whenever I Come To Ireland I Get A Wee Tingling In My Heart That I'm Where I Belong.

It's My Mind, And I Reserve The Right To Change It As Often As I Like.

Never Run With Scissors Or Other Pointy Objects.