I Want To Make A Vending Machine

I`ve Not Really Been Angling To Be A Comedian. I Knew Comics And I Loved Them And I Loved Being Funny, But I Didn't Understand The Whole Concept Of Becoming One. My First Couple Of Times On Stage, I Was Like, "this Is What I'm Doing For Sure." I Was So Excited.

Because Of Acid, I Now Know That Butter Is Way Better Than Margarine.

I Want To Ride In A Cold Air Balloon. "this Isn't Going Anywhere!"

I Want To Get A Job Naming Kitchen Appliances. That Seems Easy; Refrigerator, Toaster, Blender. You Just Say What The Thing Does And Add "er".

Knock On Wood Is A Saying For Good Luck. I Think That Started When Someone Went To Someone's Door To See If Someone Was Home. "i Hope Joe's Home, Knock On Wood!"