I Was So Wrinkled I Could Screw

It's An Ill Will That Blows When You Leave The Hairdresser.

You Can Say The Nastiest Things About Yourself Without Offending Anyone.

I Buried A Lot Of My Ironing In The Back Yard.

My Plastic Surgeon ... Said My Face Looked Like A Bouquet Of Elbows.

When I Was A Kid And We Used To Play Post Office, I Was The Dead Letter Office.