I Wonder If Illiterate People Get The

Being A Good Husband Is Like Being A Good Stand-up Comic - You Need Ten Years Before You Can Even Call Yourself A Beginner.

I Think That You Think That A Certain Something Is Not All That It Could Be, When, In Fact, It Is All That It Should Be, And More!

I Only Do A Show When There's Somebody I Want To Talk To.

They Seal The Subway Change-booth Guy Up Inside This Thing With Bullet-proof Glass, Closed In On All Sides, It's Like Some Kind Of Houdini Torture Tank Of Doom. How Do You Breathe In There? It Looks Like If You Put Your Hand Over The Change Slot, You Could Suffocate Him In Thirty Seconds.

A Chef Who Doesn't Wash His Hands Is Like A Cop Who Steals. It's A Cry For Help.