I Worked In A Pet Store And

You Know You're Ugly When You Go To The Proctologist And He Sticks His Finger In Your Mouth.

Better To Keep Quiet And Let People Think You're An Idiot Than Speak Up And Confirm It.

Yeah, I Know I'm Ugly... I Said To A Bartender, 'make Me A Zombie.' He Said 'god Beat Me To It.'

Everyone Says That Looks Don't Matter, Age Doesn't Matter, Money Doesn't Matter. But I Never Met A Girl Yet Who Has Fallen In Love With An Old Ugly Man Who's Broke.

I Don't Get No Respect, No Respect At All!