If A Thing Is Worth Having, It's

If I Had To Live My Life Over, I'd Live Over A Saloon.

The Funniest Thing A Comedian Can Do Is Not Do It.

Ah, The Patter Of Little Feet Around The House. There's Nothing Like Having A Midget For A Butler.

I've Never Hit A Woman In My Life. Not Even My Own Mother.

Was I In Here Last Night And Did I Spend A $20 Bill? Oh, Thank Goodness... I Thought I'd Lost It.