If I Found Yoko Ono Floating In

When You First Get Married, They Open The Car Door For You. Eighteen Years Now...once He Opened The Car Door For Me In The Last Four Years - We Were On The Freeway At The Time.

I'll Lie Still For A Lot Of Things - But Sex Isn't One Of Them.

Whatever You Do To Recover From A Loss, People Will Be Critical Because They Believe That The Only Way To Recover Is Their Way. And You Will Even Run Into Some People Who Should Be Run Into By Rhinos Because They Actually Don't Want To See You Get Over Your Tragedy At All; Grief Is A Spectator Sport For Them.

I Hate Mcdonald's. I Don't Want To Order My Dinner By Yelling Into A Clown's Mouth. If I Want My Face In A Clown's Mouth, I'll Tongue Kiss Glenn Beck.

I Told My Mother-in-law That My House Was Her House, And She Said, 'get The Hell Off My Property.'