If You Don't Vote, You're A Moron.

When I Stopped Drinking, It Was Only Because I Thought If I Don't Stop, I'm Going To Die.

Today Monopoly Added A New Game Piece: The Cat. The New Piece Was Chosen After Weeks Of Online Voting. Is That A Surprise? Whenever There's A Vote For Something On The Internet, The Cat Always Wins.

Democrats Are Calling Christine O'donnell 'the Sarah Palin Of The East.' Really? She's A Loud, Emotionally Unstable Woman From Delaware. That's Not Sarah Palin, That's Joe Biden.

Stand By Your Bed And Salute Me.

From 1934 To 1963, The Biggest Criminals In America Ended Up On Alcatraz. Nowadays They End Up On Wall Street.