If You Go Down As A Comedian's

Makeup's Just Crazy, Anyways. Native Americans Used To Wear It, And It Did All Right For Them Until, Uh ... Well, Until You Killed Them All, I Suppose.

When I First Came Out, I Thought, I Want To Walk Like A Real Woman, I Don't Want To Do Mincing Steps. And There Was Some Girl I Saw Walking Up Holloway Road In Islington Who Had This Long Languid Walk And I Thought, That's What I Like, So I Incorporated Her Walk Into Mine.

Scrabble Was Invented By Nazis To Piss Off Kids With Dyslexia.

If You Get Anything Creative Going, Then The Work And Play Thing Is The Same Thing, I Feel.

You Have No Control Over Your Cat! You Can't Say To Your Cat, "cat, Heel! Stay! Wait! Lie Down! Roll Over!" 'cause The Cat's Just Gonna Be Sitting There Going, "interesting Words ... Have You Finished?" While You're Shouting All This To Your Cat, Your Dog's Next To You, Going ... [mimes Obeying All Commands] "what The Hell Are You Doing? I'm Talking To The Cat!" "oh, I'm Sorry!"