It's A Privilege To Pay Taxes. Yeah!

This Is How Sad My Life Is: I Got A Scar From Scratching My Chicken Pox Too Much. That's My Big Scar Story. I Really Have No Major Scars.

Is A Bj Adultery? What? Did I Miss A Day Of School? Of Course It Is! Oral Sex Is Adultery Like Curling Is An Olympic Sport. The Only Thing Is, Oral Sex Should Be In The Olympics Because It's Much Harder Than Curling, And If You're Good At It, You Deserve A Medal!

Going Up To Canada Is Great Because I'm Not Dealing With People Carrying Their Agendas Into The Room. I'm Lucky Because 97% Of The People Who Come To The Show Know Who They Are Dealing With, Whether They Are On The Left Or The Right, We're Sharing The Same Frustration.

If Somebody Tries To Tell Me The Earth Was Created In 7 Days I Take A Fossil And Say "fossil". If He Still Won't Shut Up I Throw It At Him.

It's A Shame Cars Don't Run On Cognitive Dissonance.