It's Just To Break Things Up Between

When You Stand Alone And Sell Yourself, You Can't Please Everyone. But When You're Different, You Can Last.

I Never Could Tell A Joke. I Just Started Talking To The Audience, And When The Drunks Would Yell, "hey, When Do The Broads Come On?" I Got Good At Saying, "relax. Clear Your Skin Up First." They Called Me "the Insult Guy," But It's Never Mean-spirited. I'm Just Exaggerating Everything About Us And About Life.

I Was Sitting In The Toilet And I Was By Myself. I Was Tired Of Playing With The Roller, So I Said I'd Better Write A Book.

I Don't Feel An Obligation To Give Everyone A Hard Time, But When They're Important People, It's Fun.

You Can't Study Comedy; It's Within You. It's A Personality. My Humor Is An Attitude.