Keep Your Facts, I'm Going With The

John Boehner Will Be The New Speaker Unless, Out Of Habit, He Blocks His Own Confirmation.

If You're Doing Nothing Wrong, You Have Nothing To Hide From The Giant Surveillance Apparatus The Government's Been Hiding.

Citizens United Said That Transparency Would Be The Disinfectant, But (c)(4)'s Are Warm, Wet, Moist Incubators. There Is No Disinfectant.

If I'm Doing A Talk Show Or An Interview, Or Pretty Much Anything Where I Can't Control The Context, I'm Loath To Do The Character.

If I Had One Wish, It Would Be For Self-drying Pants. Wait -- No! Unlimited Wishes! How Do I Return These Stupid Pants?!