Let's All Start Walking More And Driving

Elvis Is Dead And I Don't Feel So Good For Myself.

In The South There's A Difference Between 'naked' And 'nekkid.' 'naked' Means You Don't Have Any Clothes On. 'nekkid' Means You Don't Have Any Clothes On And You're Up To Somethin'.

Instead Of Getting Married Again, I'm Going To Find A Woman I Don't Like And Give Her A House.

Baptists Never Make Love Standing Up. They're Afraid Someone Might See Them And Think They're Dancing.

The Only Way That I Could Figure They Could Improve Upon Coca-cola, One Of Life's Most Delightful Elixirs, Which Studies Prove Will Heal The Sick And Occasionally Raise The Dead, Is To Put Bourbon In It.