Men Date. Women Have Relationships.

Imagine My Surprise When, After A Lifetime Of Teaching Me To Keep Personal Things To Myself, Mom Insisted My Drawings Were The Start Of A Comic Strip For Millions Of People To Enjoy.

When Life Gives You Lemons, Squirt Someone In The Eye.

One Day, In 1982, For 15 Minutes, My Hair Was Perfect.

Small Wastebasket Liners, $1.17 ... Tall Wastebasket Liners, $2.29 ... Garbage Can Liners, $3.98 ... I Think I Just Spent $7.44 Buying Something I'm Going To Throw Away.

Every Time I Get Something Under Control In My Own Life, The World Provides More Material.