Men Who Listen To Classical Music Tend

When I Was A Kid, I Had Two Friends, And They Were Imaginary And They Would Only Play With Each Other.

Most Turkeys Taste Better The Day After; My Mother's Tasted Better The Day Before.

At The End Of Every Year, I Add Up The Time That I Have Spent On The Phone On Hold And Subtract It From My Age. I Don't Count That Time As Really Living. I Spend More And More Time On Hold Each Year. By The Time I Die, I'm Going To Be Quite Young.

Never Take Candy From Strangers.

I Started Taking Ballet Lessons When I Was 4, And I Was Performing In Ballet Companies When I Was 10, And I Did Summer Stock In Miami Beach When I Was 12, And Finally I Said, 'i Gotta Go To Broadway.'