Mom Claimed That I Could Carry A

I Work As Often As I Want And Yet I'm Free As A Bird

I Remember Tallulah (bankhead) Telling Of Going Into A Public Ladies' Room And Discovering There Was No Toilet Tissue. She Looked Underneath The Booth And Said To The Lady In The Next Stall, 'i Beg Your Pardon, Do You Happen To Have Any Toilet Tissue In There?' The Lady Said No. So Tallulah Said, 'well, Then, Dahling, Do You Have Two Fives For A Ten?'

Be Yourself -- It's The One Thing You Can Do Better Than Anyone Else.

There Have Been People Who Have Tried To Take Advantage Of Me. They Want To Be Linked To Me Just Because I'm Ethel Merman.

Always Give Them The Old Fire, Even When You Feel Like A Squashed Cake Of Ice.