My Children Have Made Me A Better

If Camping Is So Great, Why Are The Bugs Always Trying To Get In Your House?

When You Hear Bacon Cooking....that Sizzling Sound Isn't The Fat Cooking....that's Applause.

I Would Make Sweet Love To Don Rickles.

The Idea Of Having A Large Family, I Definitely Had A Romantic Notion Of It.

I Love The Impatience Of New York... You Ever Had Somebody Not Ask You For Directions, But Demand Them? You're Just Innocently Walking Down The Street, You Hear A Horn, All Of A Sudden Some Guy's Like, 'holland Tunnel!!!' ...you Know, Like You Were Supposed To Fax This Guy Directions. Suddenly, You're Wasting His Time.