My Name Is Ellen And I'm A

It's A Lot Of Work To Put A Brand-new Monologue And A Brand-new Show On The Air And Find Comedy Every Single Day. It's Challenging And It's The Hardest Thing I Have Ever Done, But It's The Best-suited Thing For Me. The More Relaxed I Get And The More Confident I Feel, The More I Get To Play And Be Myself...

It Must Be Around Forty, When You're "over The Hill." I Don't Even Know What That Means And Why It's A Bad Thing. When I Go Hiking And I Get Over The Hill, That Means I'm Past The Hard Part And There's A Snack In My Future. That's A Good Thing As Far As I'm Concerned.

There Would Be Nothing To Get Me To Run For President. I Don't Even Understand How Anyone Would Want That Job At All. Although I Would Be Able To Play Golf Which I Don't Seem To Have Time Now.

Yeah I'm Thirty-six, But On The Show I'm Thirty-two. Nobody Wants To Watch A Thirty-six Year Old Woman, So They Decided To Make Me Thirty-two. Much More Appealing Somehow.

I Still Have The Shirt I Wore My First Time On Johnny Carson's Show. Only Now I Use It As A Tablecloth At Dinner Parties. It Was Very Blousy.