Now Don't Get Me Wrong, I Love

Stand-up Is An Amazing Art Form, I Think, Because It's All About You Having Complete Control Of The Situation, But Absolutely None.

I Don't Know If I'm The Husky Guy, But I'm The Sexy Guy Who's A Good Kisser .

It's So Obvious The Weather Channel Is Pro Hurricane. Fair And Balanced My Ass.

I'm A Weirdo That Goes On Stage To Make Strangers Laugh, But If I Wasn't Working, I Would Just Want To Be With My Wife And Kids. I Don't Even Think I'd Want To Go Out To Dinner.

There Is The Vegetarian Hot Pocket For Those Of Us Who Don't Want To Eat Meat, But Would Still Like Diarrhea.