People Come Up To Me... Concerned... That

Charlie Chaplin Is The Greatest Artist Of The 20th Century. He Takes Me From Laughter To Tears In Seconds. And He Was One Of The Very First Funny Men. It's Like The Original Violins Were Made In Cremona And There's Never Been Any Better Since. Sometimes The Best Come Right Off The Bat.

But I Like To Swim. At High School, I Tried Out For The Swim Team. I Shaved Off All My Body Hair, And That Extra Burst Of Speed From All The Bullies Shouting Kill The Fairy.

I'm From Downer's Grove, Illinois. We Had A Blackout There The Other Day, But Fortunately The Police Made Him Get Back Into His Car Before He Got Too Far.

People Come Up To Me... Concerned... That I'll Reproduce.

Probably The Worst Time In A Person's Life Is When They Have To Kill A Family Member Because They Are The Devil. But Otherwise It's Been A Pretty Good Day.