She's As Funny As A Toothache

Maybe You Know Why A Child Can Reject A Hot Dog With Mustard Served On A Soft Bun At Home, Yet Eat Six Of Them Two Hours Later At Fifty Cents Each.

With Boys, You Always Know Where You Stand. Right In The Path Of A Hurricane.

[on Her Father's Death:] I Didn't Know His Leaving Would Hurt So Much.

As A Graduate Of The Zsa Zsa Gabor School Of Creative Mathematics, I Honestly Do Not Know How Old I Am.

I Didn't Fight My Way To The Top Of The Food Chain To Be A Vegetarian.