She Was So Fat That Her Belly

When I Was Born The Doctor Took One Look At My Face, Turned Me Over And Said, "look, Twins!"

I Don't Get No Respect, No Respect At All!

I Was An Ugly Child. I Got Lost On The Beach. I Asked A Cop If He Could Find My Parents. He Said, 'i Don't Know. There's Lots Of Places For Them To Hide'.

With My Old Man I Got No Respect. When He Took Me Hunting He Gave Me A Three Minute Head Start. Then On The Way Home He Tied Me To The Fender And Put The Deer In The Car.

I Bought A Perfect Second Car... A Tow Truck.