The Cancer In Me Became An Awareness

My Relationship To The Desecration Of The Earth Was Very Theoretical And Intellectual Until I Got Sick. I Could Never Watch Anything About Polar Bears Dying Or The Death Of Bees. There Were Certain Things I Knew I Couldn't Go Near Because They Were Too Devastating. But I Don't Think Until I Got Cancer Did I Get It In My Body, What Was Happening To The Earth. I Finally Went: "oh! Earth! Organism!"

But My Body Was Telling Its Story. I Have Read A Lot Of Stuff About Cancer. I Needed This Book. I Wish I'd Had This Book When I Had Cancer. I Wanted Someone To Be Talking To Me About "fart Floors." I Wanted Somebody Telling Me What It Was Like To Have A Colostomy Bag. I Felt So Alone. And If You're A Person Who's Been Traumatized By Past Abuse, It's So Potentially Re-traumatizing. You Slip Right Into "oh My God, This Is The Only Person This Has Happened To Before" Mentality: "i'm Especially Bad And I Have Especially Bad Cancer..."

I Really Do Think How We Frame Things Determines So Much Of Our Experience, And I've Been Talking To A Lot Of Oncologists, Like, Why Don't We Call Them Transformation Suites And Give People Transformation Juice And Have Guides That Support People When They're Going Through Chemo So You Could Actually Burn Away What Needs To Be Burned Away, As Opposed To This Dread, Terror, Horror, Which Is A Very Different Experience.

For Many Years Now, I Feel Like My Own Body Struggle Has Been Linked And Connected With Women I Meet In The World. I Think We're In This Together.

People Didn't Feel So Much Shame Around It And That They Didn't Feel So Much Humiliation Around It. And The Other Thing That People Have Given Me A Lot Of Feedback About - Something I'm Very Excited About - Is All The Stuff Around Chemo As An "empathetic Warrior."