The Comedy I Like The Best Is

I've Just Got Crap Hair. Although I Inherited A Lot Of Stuff From My Dad, Including Giant Knees, I Didn't Get His Good, Thick Hair. I Got My Mother's Thin, Wispy, Non-event Hair Instead.

As A Five-year-old In Berlin In 1965, I Didn't Know That Funny Women Existed. It Wasn't Until I Got Back To England That I Realised Women Could Be Funny.

I Can't Stand Folk Who Are All Snobby About Reality Tv.

I Don't Do Marriage. I Think It's Incredibly Naff. And I Don't Like Vulgar Displays Of Ostentation.

I've Got This Horrible Feeling That I'm One Of Those People Who'll Always Have To Flog Their Guts Out To Get Anywhere.