The Last Man That Makes A Joke

Th' Dead Ar-re Always Pop'lar. I Knowed A Society Wanst To Vote A Monyment To A Man An' Refuse To Help His Fam'ly, All In Wan Night.

Freedom Is Like Drink. If You Take Any At All, You Might As Well Take Enough To Make You Happy For A While.

Th' Newspaper Does Ivrything F'r Us. It Runs Th' Polis Foorce An' Th' Banks, Commands Th' Milishy, Controls Th' Ligislachure, Baptizes Th' Young, Marries Th' Foolish, Comforts Th' Afflicted, Afflicts Th' Comfortable, Buries Th' Dead An' Roasts Thim Aftherward.

A Lie With A Purpose Is One Of The Worst Kind, And The Most Profitable

Trust Everybody, But Cut The Cards.