The World Is A Prison In Which

A Woman Occasionally Is Quite A Serviceable Substitute For Masturbation.

A White Lie Is Always Pardonable. But He Who Tells The Truth Without Compulsion Merits No Leniency.

The Discovery Of The North Pole Is One Of Those Realities Which Could Not Be Avoided. It Is The Wages Which Human Perseverance Pays Itself When It Thinks That Something Is Taking Too Long. The World Needed A Discoverer Of The North Pole, And In All Areas Of Social Activity, Merit Was Less Important Here Than Opportunity.

Morality Is A Venereal Disease. Its Primary Stage Is Called Virtue; Its Secondary Stage, Boredom; Its Tertiary Stage, Syphilis.

Nowadays The Thief Cannot Be Distinguished From His Victim. Neither Has Any Valuable Objects On Him.