There Was A Rumor That Jesse Jackson

You Know What I'm Doing For Easter? I'm Gonna Be Hanging With My Peeps.

Big Scandal On The New 'survivor' Series. The White, The Black And The Hispanic Teams Were Caught Cheating Off The Asian Team.

Barack Obama Said Yesterday That The Economy Was 'going To Get Worse Before It Gets Better.' See, That's When You Know The Campaign Is Really Over. Remember Before The Election? 'the Audacity Of Hope!' 'yes, We Can!' 'a Change We Can Believe In!' Now It's, 'we're All Screwed.'

John Kerry Announced That He And His Wife Are Leaving On A Week-long Vacation. He's Going To Take Her Back To The Place Where He First Proposed To Her - At Her Bank.

More Warnings Issued By All Branches Of The Government Today That Another Terrorist Attack Is Imminent. We're Not Sure When, We're Not Sure Where, Just That It Is Coming. Who Is Attacking Us Now, The Cable Company?