This Shirt Is "dry-clean Only"... Which Means

I Saw A Lady On Tv, She Was Born Without Arms. That's Sad, But Then They Said, "lola Does Not Know The Meaning Of The Word 'can't'." That, To Me, Is Even Worse In A Way. Not Only Is She Missing Arms, But She Doesn't Understand Simple Contractions. It's Easy, Lola - You Just Take Two Words, Put Them Together, Take Out The Middle Letters, Put In A Comma, And You Raise It Up!

Yeah, I'm Not Into Sports. If Someone Told Me I Had Athlete's Foot, I'd Say That's Not My Foot!

I Miss The $2 Bill, 'cause I Can Break A Two. $20, No. $10, No. $5, Maybe, $2? Oh Yeah. What Do You Need, A One And Another One?

A Lollipop Is A Cross Between Hard Candy And Garbage.

I Wear A Necklace, Cause I Wanna Know When I'm Upside Down.