To The Pessimist The Light At The

Both Of My Parents Got To See Me Host Carson, Thank God. That's All Anyone Wants: To Have Their Parents See They're Going To Be All Right In Life.

Emotional Troubles Are Like Landfill. Get Them Outside, And The Air Disintegrates Them.

What I Love About Jewelry Is You Can Change It For Something Else Without Surgery.

I'm So Fat And I'm So Depressed; Last Night I Tried To Hang Myself - But The Rope Broke.

I Succeeded By Saying What Everyone Else Is Thinking.