We All Think We're Going To Get

I Think Splash Made People Realize That I Was Still Alive, And I Think I Inspired A Lot Of People. I Have People Coming Up To Me All The Time In The Airport Saying, "hey, You Inspired Me To Learn How To Swim!" "you Inspired Me To Start Moving Around More." "you Inspired Me To Start Doing More For Myself." So That Was Good. But Mostly I Took It Because Nobody Had Given Me A Job. And You Know What Really Matters In Life, Right?

I've Been In Vegas. That's Where You Get Into The Money Thing. Boy, You Get Greedy In Vegas, You Know. That's The Only Place That You Can Bet $25, Get It Up To $500 And Refuse To Quit.

I'm Still Working! I Think Of All The Other Comics That Didn't Get The Light Shined On Them, Just Because It's Just How Fame Works, And It's Unfortunate. But There Are So Many Great Comics Out There Who Are Still Working, And I Still See Them.

I Was A Terrible Actor. But John Hughes Liked Me, And He Encouraged Me. I Made Him Laugh, I Guess Is The Bottom Line, And Then He Gave Me That Part In Ferris Bueller's Day Off As The Flower Man. It's Just A Nothing Part In One Sense, But It's Such An Iconic Movie That People Will Ask Me From Time To Time, "are You In Ferris Bueller's Day Off?" "yeah."

I'm A Kid From Minnesota. I Like Seeing Movie Stars! So I'm There At The Ivy, I've Got My Shrimp, Eddie Murphy Comes In With His Gang. I Said To The Waiter, As Any Good Midwestern Boy Would, "hey, Put Eddie's Check On My American Express Card, But Don't Tell Him That I Did It 'til I'm Gone." Next Day I Got A Call From Manager Who Said, "eddie's Doing A Movie, He Was Very Impressed That You Bought Him Lunch." So Remember: Sometimes Buying People Lunch Can Really Work Out Well For You.