We Were So Poor My Daddy Unplugged

Most Parts In Comedy, They're Not Really Written For Men. They're Written For, Like, These Boy-men.

I Used To Have Horrible Cars That Would Always End Up Broken Down On The Highway. When I Tried To Flag Someone Down, Nobody Stopped. But If I Pushed My Own Car, Other Drivers Would Get Out And Push With Me. If You Want Help, Help Yourself - People Like To See That.

I Do What I Can Do When I Can Do It.

You Only Know That You're Smart Because You're Around Dumb People From Time To Time!

Now That I Have Children, I Realize Taking Care Of My Children Is More Fun Than Anything In The Whole World.