Weird Doors Open. People Fall Into Things.

I Always Think It's A Good Policy To Like The People Who Like You.

I Don't Think I'm A Witty Person. To Me, A Witty Person Is A Funny Person Who Is Also A Smart Person. My Friend David Rakoff, Who Died A Few Years Ago, He Was A Witty Person. Fran Lebowitz Is A Witty Person. I Don't Think There Are That Many Witty People Around, So You Tend To Notice Them When They Do Come Around. I Don't Consider Myself To Be That.

I Like Books On Tape, And Will Listen To Just About Anything.

The Humor Section Is The Last Place An Author Wants To Be. They Put Your Stuff Next To Collections Of Cathy Cartoons.

It Is Funny The Things That Run Through Your Mind When You're Sitting In Your Underpants In Front Of A Pair Of Strangers.