Welcome To The Academy Awards, Or, As

Everybody Knows What California Smog Is - That's Fog With The Vitamins Removed.

I Have Seen What A Laugh Can Do. It Can Transform Almost Unbearable Tears Into Something Bearable, Even Hopeful.

When You Get Over 95, Every Day Is Your Day.

My Old Friend Jack Benny Has Only Had One Ball All His Golfing Life. And Now He's Lost It. The String Came Off!

I Don't Know If The Presidential Candidates Are Running For The White House Or Animal House.