When We Played The Back End Of

A Young Mind In A Healthy Body Is A Wonderful Thing. Especially For An Old Man With An Open Night.

Be Quick To Learn And Wise To Know.

At Home We Ate Fish Every Friday, As Catholics Were Then Supposed To Do. Being Jewish, I Compromised. I Wore A Hat When I Ate Fish, Out Of Respect For My Own Religion And The Fish's Family.

I Don't Have A Drinking Problem. I Drink. I Get Drunk. I Fall Down, No Problem.

People Ask Me What I'd Most Appreciate Getting For My Eighty-seventh Birthday. I Tell Them, A Paternity Suit.