With Wives, Men Hide Behind The Air

I'm Often Accused Of Saying Some Pretty Rotten Things About My Mother-in-law. But Quite Honestly, She's Only Got One Major Fault - It's Called Breathing.

I Was Sat At The Bottom Of The Garden A Week Ago, Smoking A Reflective Cheroot, Thinking About This And That - Mostly That, And I Just Happened To Glance At The Night Sky And I Marvelled At The Millions Of Stars Glistening Like Pieces Of Quicksilver Thrown Carelessly Onto Black Velvet. In Awe I Watched The Waxen Moon Ride Across The Zenith Of The Heavens Like An Amber Chariot Towards The Void Of Infinite Space Wherein The Tethered Bolts Of Jupiter And Mars Hang Forever In Their Orbital Majesty; And As I Looked At All This, I Thought, 'i Must Put A Roof On This Lavatory.

Despite The Fact That Feminists Say They're Not Getting A Fair Deal, Women Are Still Very Powerful.

The Mother-in-law Had An Accident At Work. A Hot Rivet Dropped Down Her Drawers And She Fell Off The Oil Rig.

I Went To My Doctor And Asked For Something For Persistent Wind. He Gave Me A Kite.