Women Are Like Cars: We All Want

If It Doesn't Say Binford On It, Somebody Else Probably Made It.

But Separate A Man From His Car - That's Inhuman.

While Awaiting Sentencing, I Decided To Give Stand-up Comedy A Shot. The Judge Had Suggested I Get My Act Together, And I Took Him Seriously.

Before Kady Was Born, I Didn't Think Having A Kid Would Be Such A Big Deal. My Attitude Was Simple: Babies Are Nice, Play With Them, Put Them In The Closet Until The Next Time.

My Comedy Is Not Mine. It's A Gift. I'm Not That Smart.