You Don't Realize How Much You Use

The Reason Why You Know More Funny Dudes Than Funny Chicks Is That Dudes Are Funnier Than Chicks. If My Daughter Has A Mediocre Sense Of Humor, I'm Just Gonna Tell Her, "be A Staff Writer For A Sitcom. Because They'll Have To Hire You, They Can't Really Fire You, And You Don't Have To Produce That Much. It'll Be Awesome."

My Life Is About Building And Working And Wrenching On Some Cars.

The Truth Is We're All Probably More Creative Than We Realize, Except We Spend Our Lives Watching Tv Or Reading Somebody Else's Book. We Never Pick Up A Brush And Stand In Front Of Our Own Easel.

Screw Guilt -- I Could Have Sex With 10 Men And It Wouldn't Bother Me. I'm An Atheist!

I've Never Not Finished A Masturbatory Session Or A Pizza. Those Are The Two Things I've Never Left Behind.