All Babies Look Like Renée Zellweger Pushed

Dogs Are Easier To Love Than People; They're Certainly More Dependable. Once They Love You, That's It. A True Friend In Life Is A Dog.

I'm So Fat And I'm So Depressed; Last Night I Tried To Hang Myself - But The Rope Broke.

In Life The Only Thing That You Can Expect Is The Unexpected; The Only Surprise Is A Day That Has None.

"i've Learned What's Funny Verbally Ain't So Funny On E-mail: They Don't Hear Your Intonations. Melissa Broke Up With Somebody Over That. She Tried To Tell Him: "that Was A Joke!" But He Just Didn't Get It. Mick Jagger Said, "f- 'em If They Don't Get The Joke." And I Love Him. That Comes With Age: Knowing It's Their Problem, Not Mine."

Keep Moving. It's Hard For Old Age To Hit A Moving Target.