As A Parent, I'd - I'd Be

Banks Have A New Image. Now You Have 'a Friend,' Your Friendly Banker. If The Banks Are So Friendly, How Come They Chain Down The Pens?

I Won't Eat In A Place That Has Suits Of Armor.

I Don't Mind Being 65, But Nobody Is Gonna Tell Me To Come In At 5:30 To Have The Early Bird Special.

As Life's Pleasures Go, Food Is Second Only To Sex. Except For Salami And Eggs. Now That's Better Than Sex, But Only If The Salami Is Thickly Sliced.

We Get The Worrywart, The Hypochondriac, The Money-grubbing Miser, The Intractable Negotiator... Some Would Say Certain Of These Refer To The Stereotypical, Or 'stage' Jew. But Objectively Speaking, The Only Crime In Humor Is An Unfunny Joke.