Cats Have Nine Lives. Makes Them Ideal

I Have No Problems With Buying Tampons. I Am A Fairly Modern Man. But Apparently They're Not A "proper" Present. "happy Birthday, Mum!"

I, Of Course, Don't Have An Accent. This Is Just How Things Sound When They Are Pronounced Properly.

As Soon As I Did My First Five Minutes Of Stand-up I Knew That I Would Rather Be A Failure At Comedy Than A Success In Marketing.

I Think They Got It Wrong With Saddam Hussein. They Thought He Had The A-bomb. Instead He Had A Bomb.

Put Smarties Tubes On Cats Legs, Make Them Walk Like A Robot.