Congress May Be Going Home For The

The Audience Was Swell. They Were So Polite They Covered Their Mouths When They Yawned.

It's So Cold Here In Washington, D.c., That Politicians Have Their Hands In Their Own Pockets.

I Have Seen What A Laugh Can Do. It Can Transform Almost Unbearable Tears Into Something Bearable, Even Hopeful.

I Have Performed For 12 Presidents And Entertained Only Six.

And On Nearby Islands, The Japanese Army Was Eating Raw Fish. We Felt Sorry For Them. We Didn't Know That In America After The War, You Wouldn't Be Able To Get Into A Sushi Joint Without A Reservation. And We Thought They Lost.