Everywhere Outside New York City Is Bridgeport,

He's So Small, He's A Waste Of Skin.

A Comedian Who Starts Talking To Himself Becomes His Own Audience. This Is Fatal.

Television Is A Triumph Of Equipment Over People, And The Minds That Control It Are So Small That You Could Put Them In A Gnat's Navel With Room Left Over For Two Caraway Seeds And An Agent's Heart.

The Last Time I Saw Him He Was Walking Down Lover's Lane Holding His Own Hand.

Vaudeville Could Not Vouch For The Honesty, The Integrity, Or The Mentality Of The Individuals Who Collectively Made Up The Horde The Medium Embraced. All The Human Race Demands Of Its Members Is That They Be Born. That Is All Vaudeville Demanded. You Just Had To Be Born. You Could Be Ignorant And Be A Star. You Could Be A Moron And Be Wealthy. The Elements That Went To Make Up Vaudeville Were Combed From The Jungles, The Four Corners Of The World, The Intelligentsia And The Subnormal.